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A long-needed explanation on $self->status

[Attention] Personal content follows. If you got to this post expecting technical or organizational content, go ahead and skip it. Sometimes, when you don’t want something to happen… You don’t even talk about it. Sometimes you try hard not even to think about it - Well, it wasn’t so in this case, as it has been a long time devoted to… Thinking, thinking a lot. The important thing is that I feel there is a fact I should have shared with the people I consider close to me. And some people do know it, of course, but it has been hardest for me to share this with who I consider my closest friends - maybe out of hope that the result will be something different? Anyway… the fact is I have been living on my own for the last two months. Nadezhda and I decided to take a three month period to… Decide what comes next. And most of the time since this strange period began has been quite decent… But the last week or so has been… A bit different. I have been much more… introspective. Maybe it could be seen as more depressive, more introverted. So, what does this mean? Do I have my mind clear on what to do? No. Not by far. But I am working on finding my feelings and my reality, full-time. I might be under-achieving both in my Real-Life works and in Debian - please cope with me. There is a reason for it, as you now see. And, no, this post is not aiming at getting sympathy and hugs… It is just… Because I need to finally share this thing I am going through with. Think of it as finally stepping out of the closet, more as a step for myself than for anything else… A significant share of who I consider dear to me, even though we share no contact besides mailing lists I have mostly abandoned and two cathartic and beautiful (and, of course, technically productive!) weeks a year, lives in different timezones and countries - I do hope to have stabilized on either of the two possible realities by the time I meet my Debian fellows. As for my Mexican friends following my life by this blog… Well, just excuse me for not speaking out face to face, as this should have been done. Comments intentionally closed. Want to say something? Just think it hard enough, it will get to its destination ;-)

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